Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Rihanna Overcoming Against All Odds



At times we tend to forget that celebrities are human, well we know they are human beings but you get what I'm trying to say, with feelings and issues just like everybody else. In fact its worse for them because all the ish they go through is displayed on the world stages. Yes that's the career they chose but it doesn't make them less human or hurt less.
The Chris Brown and Rihanna fight was one that shook the entertainment world. Here were two equally and amazingly talented young individuals taking the world by storm. They loved and cared for each other deeply and they made each other happy, but, when the incident took place the world seemed to forget that and it was as if their relationship was based on violence. Behind all of the attention, media frenzy and millions of questions and poking was a woman who was hurt by the man she loved and had the unfortunate embarrassment of the whole world paying witness to it. And more so there was a man who realised that he had messed up possibly the best thing that had ever happened to him and all over a moments fury, anger and lack of control of his emotions, which is something that happens to everyone. Don't get me wrong I am by no means condoning what he did, there's nothing I hate more than woman abuse, but fact of the matter is this did not happen to us but it happened to them and them alone.

The interview (follow link below) that Rihanna did with Oprah on OWN, Oprah's network, was brave and it reminded us that they are human and this thing messed them up more than we can ever imagine and that there were deep lying issues in the midst of all of it.

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshh82THODSjhiRv4h8r

Here is the transcript of the interview (heart breaking yet inspiring)

Chris Brown's Assault?
I was hurt the most. Nobody felt what I felt. I was hurt because it happened to me. It happened to me in front of the world. It was embarrassing, it was humiliating. It was hurtful. It’s not easy. I lost my best friend. Everything I knew switched in a night and I couldn’t control that. I had to deal with that and it’s not easy for me to understand or interpret and it’s not easy for me to interpret on camera with the world watching. So it’s hard for me to pay attention to my mind and figuring things out because now it became a circus and I felt protective. I felt like the only person that they hate right now is him and it was a weird confusing space to be in. Cause’ As angry as I was, as hurt and betrayed, I felt that he made that mistake because he needed help. Who’s going to help him? Nobody is going to say, ‘he needs help’. Everyone is going to say he’s a monster without looking at the source. I was more concerned about him.

Current Relationship?
We’ve been working on our friendship again and now we are very close friends. We’ve built our trust again. We love each other and we will probably always will. That’s not anything you can change or shut off if you’ve ever been in love.
Rumors of Dating?
No, he’s in a relationship of his own.  I’m single but we have maintained a close friendship ever since the restraining order has been dropped. We just worked on it little by little but it’s not easy
Were they together at St. Tropez recently?
Yes I did. We went to a mutual friend’s party on a yacht.  It’s awkward [when I see him] because I still love him. My stomach drops and I have to maintain this poker face and not let it get to the outer part of me. I have to maintain that and suppress it and interpret it and understand it. And understand that that’s not going to go  away. That is peaceful. When you don’t understand those feelings you can make a lot of mistakes.
Chris Brown love for her?

Absolutely. I think he was the love of my life. He was my first love and I see that he loved me the same way. We were very young and very spontaneous. We ran free. We ran wild. We were falling in love and going at a really rapid pace that we forgot about ourselves as individuals. We forgot about our personal discipline. We needed something to completely shut that off and show us what we were missing, what we were taking for granted, and if we really care about each other, care about each other’s happiness so it’s not even about us being together. I truly love him so the main thing for me is that he’s at peace. I’m not at peace if he’s a little unhappy or he’s still lonely. I care. It actually matters that he finds that peace.
Forgiveness and moving on?
I have forgiven him. It took me a long time. I was angry for a long time. I felt like this is not my fault, this is not me doing this but still I had to worry.  I was resentful. I had a grudge. I was dark and it was coming out in my music and in my clothes, it was coming out in my attitude and I didn’t like that feeling. It was heavy.
[To get over it] I had to repair my relationship with my dad. I was so angry at him. I was angry about a lot of things from my childhood and I couldn’t separate him as a husband from him as a father. I felt like if he was a bad husband, he was a bad father. I witnessed a lot as a child in my household. [He was] violent. My family broke up because of his addiction. I remember one day thinking, ‘Why can’t I come to a place where I let someone in. Why can’t I love’. I’d get to a place [with guys] where I really liked them and then I’d change. I would never talk to them again and I wanted to know why.  And I wanted to know ‘what is my idea of what’s suppose to happen’?  It was because I didn’t have a relationship with my father anymore and so I wasn’t able to connect with a man past a certain point.
Father Issues
The minute I was able to realize that my father was probably one of the best fathers in the world…. Like he taught me everything, and as awful as he was to my mom at times, it didn’t compare to how great he was as a father. And I had to come to terms with that and I was able to close that gap with him and all kinds of emotions starting happening after that. All kinds of things started making sense. I thought I hated Chris and I realized it was love that was tarnished. It was ugly, it was angry, it was inflamed, it was tainted and I realized that, I had to forgive him because I cared about him still. And the minute I did that, I started living again. [Once I realized there was a connection between the two [my relationship with my father and my relationship with Chris], I had to go to the source.
I can’t tell people how to feel about it. They are entitled to be angry but I have forgiven him

Wishing Riri all the best and continue to being strong...we are allowed to fall and pick ourselves up...we are human after all. This girl is beautiful though (random thought)

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